Crazy Like A Fox: Chapter Seven

The O’Reilly Factor

Day Three

Regarding the “lipstick” scandal, those who do not watch Fox News might be shocked to discover O’Reilly does not believe Obama was intentionally smearing Sarah Palin when he referenced putting lipstick on a pig. Why he would choose to accept logic and reason on this largely irrelevant issue is a mystery to me, unless it frees him to ignore logic and reason on more important topics.

Dick Morris praised O’Reilly and went on about how great O’Reilly was, and only spent the last few seconds on poll results. He didn’t really talk about any substance, not that I am shocked by that. O’Reilly then had two other pundits on the show, both of whom praised his interviewing skills. In reference to his own interviewing skills, specifically that he did not coddle Obama, O’Reilly simply pointed at himself and said, “This is the United States of America. This is amazing.”

As if Dick Morris wasn’t bad enough, Dennis Miller was there to weigh in on the “issues.” Or, as O’Reilly put it, “Miller’s on tap.” Miller compared O’Reilly to Conan the Barbarian. I think I passed out after hearing that.

As if people needed another classic O’Reilly moment, I have one. Yesterday, he said, “Fox News is not hateful.” Today, when discussing the common internet practice of Photoshopping someone’s face on someone else’s body, O’Reilly was angry that bloggers had pasted Palin’s face on the body of a gun toting woman in a bikini. When it was suggested “The Daily Kos” was among those guilty of this heinous crime, O’Reilly referenced the scene in “Frankenstein” when a mob of people with pitchforks and flaming torches stormed the castle gates, and he told his viewers how great it would be if people did the same thing to the people at “The Daily Koz.” To be clear, O’Reilly’s proposed solution for those who abuse Photoshop is for them to be killed by a savage mob. Man, I would hate to hear O’Reilly’s suggested punishments if he were hateful.

O’Reilly went on to ask Amanda Carpenter of “Townhall.com” if there was a right wing blog comparable to what the “The Daily Koz” does (or what he perceives them to do) on the left. Without hesitating, Carpenter replied, “Well, Townhall is one of them!” Oddly, even though the spokesperson for Townhall.com just admitted to, at the very least, a right wing bias, O’Reilly stepped up and said, “You don’t do that. You do straight reporting.” I realize I have been repeating myself in these reviews, but I really want to emphasize that when Carpenter admitted her website was affiliated with the right wing, O’Reilly insisted it was not. What this tells me is that O’Reilly doesn’t know the difference between biased coverage and coverage legitimately “fair and balanced.” This explains a lot.

Joy Behar and Matt Damon were tonight’s “Pinheads.” Don’t ask. I mean, sure, they are both pinheads, but not for any reasons suggested by “The O’Reilly Factor.”