RP: 2/10: I said Doctah, aint there nothing I can take, I said Doctah …

The Remote Patrol for Tuesday, February 10, 2009
by Thomas Allen Heald, feels like the wishbone is broken and he lost
All times Eastern, for PBS programs, check local listings

TOM’S TOTALLY TWISTED TV TRIVIA THINGY
As of tonight, how many episodes have aired of “American Idol”?
A) 199
B) 227
C) 282
D) 364
E) 405

The correct answer will hit all the right notes (in the wrong key)
tomorrow..

—
8 p.m.
Speaking of which, no, you still don’t get to vote yet on “AMERICAN
IDOL” (Fox).

“THE BIGGEST LOSER” (NBC) celebrates 100 episodes. And we all know what that means: cake! Just kidding, Melba toast and Crystal Light!

9 p.m.
“T.I.’S ROAD TO REDEMPTION: 45 DAYS TO GO” (MTV) counts down the  Grammy-winners remaining days among civilians while doing 1,500 hours on weapons charges. Moral: getting caught with guns can get you a show on MTV.

“NOVA” (PBS) smacks back at Ben Stein with “Judgment Day: Intelligent Design on Trial,” a look at the case of Kitzmiller v. Dover School District. But you’re probably going to be watching …

“FRINGE” (Fox) instead, because the creepy disease of the week causes peoples mouths and nostrils to close up, suffocating them. Can we get a dose of this shipped to the 8 p.m. Fox show?

The new interns still aren’t helping much on “SCRUBS” (ABC). So lets see how they do when sentenced to help with J.D. and Turk’s annual staff variety show.

“DARWIN’S SECRET NOTEBOOKS” (National Geographic) follows the journey of the Beagle beyond just the Galapagos Islands. FUN FACT: Charles Darwin did not use a Mead(r) Trapper Keeper(tm) to bind his notes.

10 p.m.
“LEVERAGE” (TNT) has jury duty.

“TULIA, TEXAS” (PBS) is sited through the “Independent Lens,” thanks to the treatment of those arrested in the biggest drug busts in Texas history, and the priors of the arresting officer.

Spaceman vs. Moon over Parma as Drew Carey hits “SHATNER’S RAW NERVE” (Bio).

Just when “NIP/TUCK” (FX) couldn’t sink any lower, Kimber demands Botox for her infant so she can dominate the world of baby modeling. Boy, thats almost as creepy as …

America’s newest divorced unemployed purposefully implanted mother to octuplets being interviewed on “DATELINE” (NBC), preempting “LAW & ORDER: SPECIAL VICTIMS UNIT.” How is this not sweeps, people?!?

TALK SHOW DEATHMATCH
Dave hosts he crew of US Airways “Miracle On The Hudson” Flight 1549.
Jay preys with Bill Maher.
Jimmy W.welcomes Josh Brolin, and a contestant from “Dancing with the Stars” Season 8 to be named later.
Craig puffs up for Sean “Diddy” Combs.
Conan is in hell with Norm Macdonald, Gordon Ramsay, Levon Helm
Grammy winning diva Adele visits Carson.
TONIGHT’S WINNER: No question: Dave.

QUESTIONABLE ANSWERS
Which 1980s B-movie features 2 “Boston Legal” actors, as well, as cast members from “Desperate Housewives” and “Brothers & Sisters”? “Bad Influence” with Rob Lowe, James Spader, and Marcia Cross. To say nothing of “Judging Amy’s” Lisa Zane and David Duchovny.