This… is… “Jeopardy!”

Alex Trebek acts all smug and pompous because he knows all the answers. Well, here they are. At least, here are the 50 questions for this evening’s online “Jeopardy!” audition. Forgive any errors in spelling. I plowed through typing these as soon as I finished the audition, and my head is still buzzing. Some easy, some difficult, others so far afield I wonder what the question writers were smoking. Each question is preceded by its category in bold. Enjoy, and good luck trying to get the theme song out of your head.

Dr. Seuss Characters

Seuss wrote “I am” this title guy “I speak for the trees”

A Little Bit Country

“Jesus Take the Wheel” is a song by this “Americal Idol” winner

The Cabinet

Janet Napolitano heads up this cabinet department

On “Q”

It once meant wise or skilled, now it means old-fashioned and charming

Famous Americans

In 1963 he began writing his “Letter From Birmingham Jail” on the margin of a newspaper

Peninsulas

Lake Scutari on the border of Albania and Montenegro is the largest lake on this peninsula

Poetry

This poem begins “Half a league, half a league, half a league onward…”

Artists

At his home in Givarny, this artist created the water lily pond that inspired his paintings

Name that planet

It is the second largest planet in our solar system

Food, glorious food

Types of this include fingerling and long white

Comic Strip Kids

He’s Lucy Van Pelt’s younger brother

Ancient History

Pericles was one of the instigators of this war between Athens and Sparta that began in 431 B.C.

Double talk literature

This 1936 William Faulkner work was so nice he named it twice

Magazines

“Talk of the Town” is a feature of this weekly

U.S. Ports

This port in Mississippi was the capital of the Louisiana Territory for a brief time in the early 1700s

Anatomy

It is the scientific word for the kneecap

Compound words

In days of yore, women sometimes rode in this style, meaning both feet on the same flank of the horse

Novelists

His novels include “All the Pretty Horses,” “The Apocalyptic,” and “The Road”

Toys & Games

Reynolds Gyver created the 4-inch foam ball later sold under this brand name

Classical musicians

Pinchas Zuckerman and Sarah Chang are renowned performers on this instrument

Kings of England

In 1193, the first English king of this name married Berengaria of Cyprus

South America

Ecuador and this Pacific Coast Nation are the continent’s only two countries that don’t border Brazil

Intellectuals

Henry Louis Gates, Jr, author of such books as “America Behind the Color Line,” has taught at this university since 1991

On Broadway

Abigail Breslin is said to play Helen Keller in a 2000 revival of this William Gibson drama

The New Testament

The full name of the fifth book of the New Testament includes “of the Apostles”

Nobel Prize Winners

In the 1940s this Nobel Prize winner and Vitamin C advocate studied the structure of antibodies

Silent K

The sound of a bell ringing ominously

Asian Currencies

This equals 100 Sen

What are we quoting?

1776: “The summer soldier and the sunshine patriot will, in this crisis, shrink from the service of their country”

The State It’s In

Corvallis in this state is at the head of the Willamette River

International Stars

In “Vicki Cristina Barcelona,” she played neither Vicky nor Cristina but Maria Elena

Animals

The giant species of this South American constrictor is the world’s biggest snake

State Symbols

It’s Ohio’s state tree

Famous Novels

Chapter XX of this 1897 novel contains entries from Jonathon Harker’s journal

The Elements

The chemical symbol for Potassium isn’t P, PM, or PT, but instead this single letter

Legal Words

The party that institutes a civil suit in court

TV Theme Songs

Barenaked Ladies sing this sitcom’s theme, which begins, “Our whole universe was in a hot, dense state…”

Modern Africa

Local courts called “Gacacas” are alleviating the backlog of cases arising from this country’s 1994 genocide

Starts With A

From the German, it’s a 5-letter word for anxiety & apprehension

Charitable Organizations

It gets its name from a 1938 radio appeal to raise small amounts of money from many people

World of Opera

The full name of this opera house means “Theater at the Stairway”

Women of Mystery

As of 2000, this author has made it to “U is for Undertow”

Rhyme Time

A certain chess piece, it’s also used to mean “a savior”

Inventions

In 1794, getting old and perhaps having trouble reading, Ben Franklin invented these

The Southern Hemisphere

This city is home to Bondi Beach, popular for surfing and more

Flowers

In 1997, two Dutch growers unveiled “The Blackjack,” the darkest species of this flower ever developed

American Authors

The chronicler of Eastwick passed away in 2009

Potent Potables

From south of the border, it’s the top-selling imported beer in the US

Supreme Court Justices

Between 1804 & 1807 while chief justice, he published a 5-volume “Life of George Washington”

Sports Stars

This tennis player was born August 8, 1981 in Basel